Recovery
by Eemillee 2
Summary: This is a slightly different version of 'Beginnings'. Remus forgives Sirius and all is well with the Marauders again. But Remus cannot help but notice that Sirius isn't entirely himself and is now helping Sirius recover from the guilt, despite everything


Sirius

So much can change in just one mistake. I'm all but gaping at the changes I can see in Remus.

"Moony?" His nickname stumbles from my mouth. He looks up from his book and stiffens. He's pale, and his auburn hair is shaggy-though it's not close to the full moon.

"I'm sorry. I really, really am. Snape was insulting you, Wormtail and Prongs. I was so _mad_ and I wasn't thinking. That's no excuse, but…I, I couldn't take it. I'm sorry. I won't bother you again." The words slam ungracefully and halt abruptly, but they get my point across. I don't think I've ever apologized this much before _the_ Prank-or at all. My muscles tense to vault me out of here before Remus can see me cry, but a hand stops me. I look up, nervous and foolishly hoping. Remus smiles, showing his slightly-too-sharp teeth.

"It's okay, Pads. It's okay." For a moment I'm frozen-why would he, why should he forgive me? Then I smile- REMUS FORGIVES ME!

"Sorry, sorry," is all I can say as we hug.

"It's about time you got over your lovers' spat," James mocks, walking in. I can see the careful watching in his eyes as he studies me. He knows I'm still horrendously guilty. "That's all it's been since July. Depression and self-hatred." Remus frowns and he opens his mouth to say something. Suddenly, he freezes, and the frown deepens, becoming puzzled.

"July?" he finally asks. Peter nods, messing his hair. My lips twitch up. We've all picked up on each others' habits, ruffling our hair was one from James.

"Padfoot moved in with Prongs for good," Peter squeaked.

"Well. I feel like a schmuck," Remus says after a moment of silence. I shake my head, trying to clear it.

"As long as you're here, I'm the happiest man on earth," I joke, trying to lighten the atmosphere. James frowns-he notices the look on my face. Peter, ignorant as always, laughs. Remus is smiling-but it's obviously forced. He knows something's up, too.

* * *

Remus

It's been over three months since I've last spoken to Sirius. I look down at my book, feeling my chest tighten.

"Moony?" The boy in thought sits across from me, his face pale. I glance up and stiffen. There are shadows under his eyes-normally a pale grey, now a stormy blue-grey- and now he's thinner.

"I'm sorry. I really, really am. Snape was insulting you, Wormtail and Prongs. I was so _mad_ and I wasn't thinking. That's no excuse, but…I, I couldn't take it. I'm sorry. I won't bother you again." The words crash and stumble, then halt with a heavy sigh. Before he can stand, I lean in and press my palm on his eyes. I smile, flashing my teeth.

"It's okay, Pads. It's okay," I say, using his shortened nickname. I had forgiven him ages ago-sometimes it takes a while to trust again. A smile breaks across his face and his eyes sparkle, back to their light color.

"Sorry, sorry," he repeats over and over as we exchange a tight hug. James and Peter walk in, grinning when they notice we're hugging.

"It's about time you got over your lovers' spat," James mocks, lightly punching my shoulder. "That's all it's been since July. Depression and self-hatred." Behind the joking tone is worry. I frown and start to scold Sirius about wallowing, when James' words hit me.

"July?" I question. Peter nods, ruffling his wispy blond hair. A habit we've all picked up on from James. James did it when he was nervous; Peter did it when he was excited. Sirius did it when he was frustrated; I did it when I was flustered.

"Padfoot moved in with Prongs. He ran away from home for good," Peter announced, clearly glad that he knew something I didn't for once. Well. I feel like a schmuck. I voice my opinion and James snickers. Sirius shakes his head violently, frowning.

"As long as you're here, I'm the happiest man on earth," he jokes, his tone at contrast with the look in his eyes. James frowns and Peter laughs, oblivious. I force a smile; I can't help but feel that Sirius wasn't entirely _Sirius. _He wasn't the laid back, reckless over-sized puppy from before _the_ Prank.


End file.
